My Eating Disorder & Recovery Story
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My Eating Disorder & Recovery Story

August 23, 2019

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  1. But your so beautiful and I'm so happy that your recovering I don't know if you would be able to understand how much this this means to me I love you and your videos so much and I definitely wish you the best of luck for the future ❤

  2. Wow. You're A LOT like me. Well I'm a lot like you I should say. I have a eating disorder and I'm going through recovery right now. I'm only 14. I like to keep things to myself I don't like telling anyone. But my mom is going to take me to the doctors to talk but I don't want to talk. I'm doing just fine but my mom won't believe me. I also get super super depressed at times. I used to run cross country to get all of it out but I injured myself so it's not as easy now. I also write in my journal every day. and I wrote poems of how I'm feeling or how my day went. it helps a lot. this video also helped a lot so I thank you so very much. and I wish you the best of recovery.

  3. Libby I think you're super strong and cool and honestly this video seems like it was hard for you to make, but I like that you wanted to try to help people. Sometimes I watch things like this and really want to meet/chat with you.

  4. Keep your head up babe! All you can do is stay positive and keep trying. You know your demons and you understand them, now you have power over them! Go you! <3

  5. thank you for sharing this story. I'm really happy that you're getting better. you're absolutely wonderful and nice person who create amazing content. I wish you all the best and send virtual hugs from another part of the planet. you are not alone. you're bright and beautiful. keep fighting <3

  6. Hi Libby! I myself am battling right now with body confidence issues and making myself sick. Its honestly such a long hard battle at the moment as the mental health service's in the UK are so bad. Watching this video makes feel so much less alone. Your inspire me anyway but this video just inspires me further💕💕

  7. My parents found out about my eating disorder a couple years ago. Recover is super hard, still have relapses. Just got out of the hospital for the second time last December. When I got out my family put me in intense therapy for my depression so they watch my weight very closely. Now my family has a rule to weigh ourselves and journal it. But in the end they all do what they do to keep us healthy and safe. Thank you Libby, you inspired me to write this comment.

  8. You're so courageous! I could never tell people about my deepest secrets like that… Especially to thousands of people! Anyways, I hope you're still doing well and I love youu!❤️

  9. It's fascinating how similar your story and struggles are to my problems on the other side of the spectrum being over weight. Thank you for sharing your story, you inspire me!

  10. I have an addiction (something I would rather not get into on the internet since the fear of being judged and stuff) but I have been getting help. I'll check out the website

  11. I think you are absolutely beautiful, not that my opinion really matters. It takes so much strength, so much bravery, to admit that you have a problem, and even more to get help. You are an amazing person, and a real asset. You have helped me learn Sign Language, but you have also become someone I am excited to see/hear from on a regular basis. Stay strong girl! ❤

  12. You are a beautiful person. Inside and out. The fact that your goal is to help people is so pure and so rare and it is honestly so inspiring to watch you just be you. You are such a brilliant person 💗

  13. Hey daily sign I having a problem with this kinda situation like part me thinks I fat and I low self esteem and my thoughts always say like I shouldent eat but I dont listening to my thoughts and eat but part me what's to stop eating the other does I know it kinda confusing etc but I just don't know what to do so can u give advice if u read this

  14. Hi! Thank you for sharing something so personal with everyone. I struggled with a eating disorder for years myself and it's not easy trying to recover from it because it'll always be on your mind.. but you're beautiful , dont let anyone ever tell you different!! You're def an inspiration!

  15. Same thing happened to me when I went to a psych ward for a week. They did NOTHING for me. Like, I was gonna kill my self could you give a fuck about how to help me?? Part of it was that my mom was against antidepressants, and the fact that they had to tell her everything that I told them which was bullshit. She was the source of my depression, the reason I became depressed and I couldn't tell them that because I was afraid of what she would do to me. Because I knew I was going back home st the end of the week. It was nice being away from home because it was what made me depressed in the first place. But they made no efforts to do anything for me. They asked me how I felt everyday, I ate some food, and sat in group therapy and listened to everybody else and said nothing. Then my mom hung my hospital bill over my head forever, and it fills me with guilt everyday. That's why I never told anybody how I felt because they were gonna turn around and tell my mom thinking she'd care and do something but no. She was abusive mentally and emotionally and manipulative as fuck and she put up an act with everyone but me and my sister. It was fucking stupid. Anyway long story short fuck that shit.

  16. I know it's definitely a different subject, but I've been thinking about starting a blog or talking about how I handled depression and anxiety along with grief. Can you give me any support or tips for starting a video to talk about what I went through?

  17. It's awesome that you found a therapy that works for you (Youtube). I'm still in search of mine. Thank you for this because it gives me a little hope

  18. Hi Libby! I'm Brazilian ( I don't know why I have the need to tell where I'm from but I always do that, anyways ), I d know I just wanted you to know that I'm depressed and, I know how hard it is, so I'm happy for you 'cause you said that you're ok now and I hope it is true. I hope someday I will get better too. You're an inspiration for me. Thanks

  19. What I don't understand is why to some eating disorder clinics think it helps to make people eat a bunch of junk food?? Like yes it makes you gain weight faster but then wouldn't you get used to eating unhealthy?? Idk it just never really made sense to me.

  20. I never troll YouTube, I never watch channels, I don't spend hours watching videos. I am learning sign currently and saw a video of yours that struck me. I watched a couple because ASL is awesome. I came across this video and watched it through. I never had an eating disorder but I was severely depressed in high school, I was a cutter, I cried myself to sleep. I hated life. I have never ever related to a video or someone's "story" or experience more. Your track record with therapists, your feelings about talking with your family and close friends, your talk about being in your head and being able to finally talk yourself down. Bad days, hiding, finding someone to help you out of the trenches, it all hit home for me. I have been in recovery now for about 2 years. I still fear of falling back and I still have bad days, but I am thankful to have the tools to help myself. You will get to the point someday where your body finally knows normal again. WHen you get there, your body will even better know what is bad and you will hopefully be able to help yourself. My recovery came once I left for college too and same when I realized I had a great life and if I wanted to live it, I had to change. I am just weeping right now, Thank you so so much for sharing. Like I said I do not watch videos on YouTube and certainly never comment on them or feel strongly enough to say something. I am so glad I found this though. Good luck in your recovery and in school and good luck with interpreting. My best friend is studying elementary ed. for Deaf and Hard of Hearing. Where I have learned all my signs are from her and her interpreter friends. #changetheworld #oneSIGNatatime

  21. I can not tell you how important this video was to me. I am a very frequent watcher of your channel and I actually have learned a lot from you. My dream to to be able to sign like you and get my degree in ASL. During my soph year or high school I developed my ED as well. It was a difficult journey but I landed myself into a mental hospital within a year and started recovery part one. I had a nasty relapse almost 6 months later and the guy I was with at the time actually helped me eat. He would buy my food and I was taught if someone buys you food never turn it down. That concept helped me recover again for almost 4 years now. As of now, I'm teetering dangerously close to relapse and to hear you say those things helped my out so much. You're my idol. Thank you. Bless you.

  22. I had an eating disorder for six years and have been post recovery for five years. I spent a very short time in in-patient recovery (like a weekend) and about 5 months in out patient, though journaling was most helpful for me too. Eventually I had an experience that opened my eyes and made me snap out of it in a way. I've learned that recovery is different for everyone. Eating disorders are like being alcoholic (it's an addiction and it triggers similar part of the brain) Everyone has their different reasons for developing one and everyone is dependent on it to different degrees and everyone recovers to different degrees. I have a friend who is completely recovered; it's become a non-issue for her and she has none of the habits or compulsions she did before. I have another friend who's come a long way but still struggles a lot. And I am somewhere in the middle. The actions aren't there but the thought processes are sometimes. I guess the point is, your disorder is unique to you and your recovery is unique to you so even though someone else has had a recovery that wasn't able to get them to 100%, doesn't mean yours will be the same. Keep on doing what you're doing to overcome this. You're going to be just fine.

  23. Thank you so much for sharing your story. You are incredibly strong to go through all of that, pull through, and then talk publicly about it. I have always thought you are absolutely beautiful, so it breaks my heart to know that you've been looking at yourself with discontent. But that's how it is with mental health problems–there's really no logic to them. I suffer from anxiety, and the most ridiculous thing is having an anxiety attack because I'm anxious about getting anxious. Ugh. Do know this about eating disorders: you CAN completely recover and not have to go through the daily struggle anymore. Of course, there's always going to be at least a slight tendency, but you can recover to the point where it doesn't affect your daily life at all. I know a few people like this. So there's hope! So rock on (and put back on a little weight)!

  24. unless ALL types of addicts don't actually want help it doesn't matter what you do it wont change, forcing them to go rehab or therapy won't do anything but make them angry

  25. Prayers for u sweet beautiful girl. love u and all ur vids. I'm 44 and learning asl. 🙂 I've always knew a little bit now I'm really serious on learning. thx for opening up about ur disorder. I know it has to be hard to open up. your the best. 😘😘😘

  26. I don't have and never had an eating disorder but when I was little i got headaches ALL the time and threw up about once a month ( wich is more than one it seems trust me) and doctors did tests on me i had to stay in the hospital a couple times but they didn't figure out why I got headaches and they still don't know. I still get headaches a lot Also, when I get hot or dehydrated I get headaches and i don't really like to drink water cause I just don't get thirsty and stuff and it's always burning and I get overheated so I've been getting more headaches lately. I don't have headaches as much anymore but for the last month or two I've had one every day. But the one thing that made headaches the worst is that I've always been shy and was bullied. She was not just bullied by people saying stuff but sometimes I got physically hurt. In third grade I wasn't bullied but I never really fit in. I have been with my friends for over 3 years now and still feel uncomfortable around them. I hope you get better srry about your eating disorder

  27. I feel your pain, I have/had an eating disorder. Im not sure if it is considered Anorexic but I use to Barely eat, take diet pills (8 a day) and exercise for 4+ hours a day. I still struggle daily but I owe my recovery to my daughter and my husband. I was headed for a bad place. I'm glad you are recovering and I hope you continue to Recover <3

  28. Thanks for sharing. I know this was difficult to talk about. Hugs!!! Keep your head up. Best wishes to you all. ❤❤❤❤❤

  29. I don't cry and this made me cry and I don't like talking about my feeling's to my family ether

  30. I have a binge eating disorder and I feel so much like no one cares, I can't talk to my parents because they don't believe that I have anything wrong with me

  31. I've been seeing therapists since I was about seven, due to depression and anxiety, and started developing unhealthy eating habits at age about 10 or 11. At the time I had been self harming for a few months, and my school found out and sent me to the school counsellor. I didn't improve, and by the time I was 13 I had been hospitalised for anorexia and survived a suicide attempt, and even though I was discharged within eight weeks of being admitted to hospital, I haven't been able to change my mindset. I'm still struggling at the moment, I can barely leave the house, but watching your videos really helps me. Thank you ❤️

  32. Wow, I just want to say thank you for how you did this video. As I was watching I could already feel myself grow sad and miss my disorder a bit. I was afraid that watching this video was me triggering myself. But then you started saying how you wouldn't go into specifics because there's no point and I realized how real that was. People literally go out and look for these videos to inspire themselves to be sick again. They see those photos and hear those numbers and it forms new goals in their heads. So thank you for keeping that in mind. Thank you for understanding.

  33. I don't mind eating in front of people- my parents; at school, etc, but I am very, very insecure about my weight; I dont weigh myself anymore cuz I'm afraid that the number on the scale will be higher.. I try my best to hide my figure cuz I don't like the way I look at all.. 😔😔

  34. I have had serious depression and have been sexually abused, and Therapy never helped me. EVER. The people who HAVE helped me were my friends. They have helped me. Now, I am the most perky of my friends lol.

  35. That sucks so hard that they didn't respect your wishes or collaborate with you on any of your treatment plans. That has nothing to do with being an adolescent. You agreed to do therapy and they did nothing to help you. That is so frustrating to hear. therapists and doctors needed to work together with you to come up with a treatment plan that you wanted to participate in. Not all therapists are so bad. I'm so sorry to hear you had such a bad experience with the whole process.

  36. I was severely anorexic when I was a young kid. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I still struggle with it at times, but my wife helps out a lot.

  37. Wow wonderful story very touching thank you for sharing. I love your honesty. Your a very beautiful young woman. If I can be honest with you I don't really care for the profanity that's just me. You'll be in my prayers glad your doing better.

  38. Ok, so for some reason my mom watched this video and told me to watch it. I don't have it , I cried though . FOR THE PEOPLE THAT THNK THIS IS STUPID, HOW DARE YOU!?!?!

  39. Libby you are so brave and amazing for putting yourself out there and talking about recovery is a tough topic no matter what you are recovering from! It takes guys and girl you got this! Love you and praying for you!

  40. I'm suffering from sevier depresssion and when I went to out patient therapy I absolutely hated, it didn't help me at all it just made my depression worse and now I'm on medication which isn't really helping either

  41. A year and a half later, i hope you are doing better. I know we never completely recover from it, but it gets easier to keep it under control. I struggled with bulimia and sometimes still feel like binging but i either do something to get my mind off of it or binge in veggies lol

    You are a gorgeous strong young woman. And even when people tell us stuff like that, i know we don't feel that way and think "yeah whatever, that's what you think, you don't know me" but believe me, even when you don't feel it, it's there, it's in you. Always.

    Keep your head high. Keep being you. Love yourself. You are worth more than you think and loved more than you'll ever imagine.

    💜💙💜💙💜

  42. Stay strong! You're brave to share this with everyone here! No should go through something like this.
    I don't know what it's like to go though an eating disorder, so I can only imagine what it's like to go through it.
    At least you're doing better now!

  43. Happy that you're doing well; you may want to have an endoscopy and see if you've possibly developed Barrett's Esophagus (I have, but not from an ED).

  44. I’m currently recovering from bulimia. It’s hard and I don’t like talking about that stuff with my family. I’ve seen two therapists but neither really helped, but I’m doing so much better now and am very happy. My friend has helped me a lot and I still have bad days but am learning to deal with them in healthy way. I’m proud of you for telling your story and without sharing numbers and “tips and tricks.” I’ve watched several videos that did trigger me and watching this has made me realized that I shouldn’t watch more of those videos. I say that only because I’m dealing with one myself and instead of those videos being encouraging (for me at least )I feel worse. Anyway I love your videos and am currently learning ASL which I’m really enjoying. You are such a beautiful person! I really hope you stay healthy and continue to be happy:)

  45. It is hard. I have been there. While it never truly goes away, it does get easier to deal with and be healthy. I know we have never met,and in all reality probably never will, but I am proud of you for whatever that is worth. Stay strong.

  46. I have mental health too. I have anxiety, depression and other mental health. I don't really eat right know BC im really depressed.

  47. This video really help me to at least feel better. Thank you for all you have done through your channel to help others!!!! I'm so glad for your videos! Thank you so much!!!💜💜💜💜😘😘😘😘

  48. i have eating disorder too when i was in college.. almost anorexia. one day i only eat once with very small amount of food but still doing my gym, even when i eat once with that amount, i felt very guilty.. like "why i should eat this ? stupid !"
    every time my friends asked me to join them to have a lunch or dinner, i just said "no, i'm full" even i just eat small food. i even prepared very small plate for me to eat.. even with that plate, i still eat half of it.
    then my gym trainer said to me that i become anorexia and it's not good. he start to dragged me to have healthy lunch but still not working on me..

  49. Thank you for being so open about this issue. I'm struggling with it in a low point right now. This video made me feel very much less alone right now. I've been in the whirlwind of hospitals and therapists…SUCKS. I just wanna say thank you Libby <3

  50. So upsetting to hear you say that you started counting calories when you were 12, I remember counting calories when I was that young too. Please just remember that our culture when it comes to women’s bodies is still very toxic. Don’t listen, and try to disengage as much as you can from harmful media where you can. Unfollow models on Instagram, it’s doing nothing healthy for you.
    In a world that demands you to look a certain way, it’s courageous to subvert that by not letting it control you, and for you to live a healthy lifestyle, with a healthy mind and body, no matter what shape you are.

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