From Bulimia To Bodybuilder
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From Bulimia To Bodybuilder

August 19, 2019


LAURA PAYNE: I replaced my eating disorder with bodybuilding. LAURA PAYNE: Okay. I am eating. COMM: Laura Payne has battled bulimia and
anorexia since she was a teenager. But now the 32-year-old is a champion body builder. LAURA PAYNE: My lowest weight was 82 lbs.
That’s with pants, sweater and everything on it at the doctor’s office. But back then
it’s just like ‘How skinny can I get?’ I do think I replaced my eating disorder with
bodybuilding. With competing you’re still in control of what you eat and how much you
eat. All your food’s accounted for. DANIEL DORETHY: One thing about eating disorders, you don’t overcome eating disorders. It’s
something that you learn to live with. COMM: Laura started to struggle with anorexia when she was in high school. LAURA PAYNE: Starts out because you think
you’re too fat or someone thinks you’re ugly or someone doesn’t like you and then
in college when the social events came along, the bulimia started because that was the parts
where I would have to go eat with fit people that would be the only way to get rid of the food.
So, that’s how that cycle began and I would throw up, it would all my cares would be
away, it made me feel good. Your day is consumed with the thought of food. I remember in class
I’d sit there and looks like I am studying but I’m adding my calories up, ‘If I eat
this. How much is that?’ COMM: When her parents found about her eating disorder they took her out of college until
her health improved. LAURA PAYNE: I am okay now. But it’s not gone. I constantly think about food. I am
constantly worried about how I look or if I have put on too much weight. COMM: Laura met her husband Jason 8 years
ago in her hometown of Odessa, Texas, and began lifting weights with him shortly after. LAURA PAYNE: He has helped me overcome it.
I eat now because of him. JASON PAYNE: I don’t diet. I like to eat. I like to go have ice cream and that is hard
going through this and struggling with Laura. It has taken a lot of patience to get her
to where she is at right now for me. And I am not very patient at all, kind of hard trying
to push that on her and I know I do it more than I should. We are both working on it. COMM: Now Laura consumes 2,000 calories a
day and owns a gym where she works out at least five times a week. And she is also a
competitive bodybuilder. COMM: When I compete, this year I came in at 125. Right now I am around 150. It’s
off-season. So, I mainly eat to lift and be stronger and gain more muscles. This is my
first competition. I won first place here long time ago. Love my long hair. I miss it.
It was fun. It’s hard. It’s frustrating though, because you know you can look like and
then mentally it’s hard because you just, you like, I feel awful right now. It’s 20
weeks of dieting to get to this. COMM: Laura keeps all of her old pictures and food diaries to remind her how far she
has come. LAURA PAYNE: It feels crazy to look at the bones, they stick out or how little my legs and arms
are and face. There’s no butt, no boobs, no there’s nothing. And it’s sad because
girls want to be skinny but none of that’s attractive. COMM: Look at this one because my hair was
falling out at that time. So you can tell in the front that my hair was actually falling
out. COMM: In an attempt not to relapse, Laura has ben seeing the same counselor since she
was 22. DANIEL DORETHY: When she came to me she was consumed in her mental health disorder, which
she was at a dangerous point of her life. At the point of her life to where little mattered.
I think the body building part is related to the disorder. She learned to figure out
what her mental health disorder was and learned more about it than most people would know
even in the profession. So, she was able to take this negative and turn it
into a positive. COMM: As well as worrying about herself, Laura also fears that her daughter Kylie might develop
an eating disorder. LAURA PAYNE: When I found out I was pregnant, the worst thought that I had was, ‘I do
not want to have a girl.’ If I found out my daughter was having similar problems as
I did. It would hurt because I would probably feel responsible. I try not to obsess over
myself in front of her, but it’s hard. It’s very hard. After this competition season it
hit me hard because I gained weight fast and I just broke down in front of her in the car.
You know, I know she sees it. I feel like you will deal with it for the rest of your
life. I think you learn how to deal with it and make it work for you. I think it just,
it’s always back there, always in the back of my mind nagging me. I still obsess over myself.

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  1. This is probably an unpopular opinion, but isn't her obsession with body building just another detrimental disorder? I feel like yeah, anorexia is obviously worse to her health, but it's still an obsession with something. Anorexia is an obsession to be thin and calorie restrict and body building is an obsession with fitness. I feel like there's a middle ground and balance between the two.

  2. she my gone to another obsession but at least you can tell she natural body builder. natural female body builders have more feminine build.

  3. In this case she does admit to linking her disorder to her bodybuilding, but it's not like that's why anyone bodybuilds. It's a sport, a competition you train for, just like doing laps swimming or running marathons. The sport isn't the dangerous part.

  4. in my experience i believe theres no such thing as full recovery. i think youre in recovery for the rest of your life

  5. I know this may not be her deal but a lot of people have an eating disorder and then start compulsive excercisin. And that is still considered and eating disorder. I'm glad she has overcome that

  6. LOL from the start of the video i thought this was a video about DLB, she looks so much like her in the shot of her on stage

  7. sry to burst your guys' bubble that think she's healthy now, she is not. When she had bulimia she had a higher fat percentage than when she competes. Normal women have around 20-25%, with bulimia she had around 10-15%, when competing she has around 5-7%. How? Lots of steroids and diuretics + extreme dieting. No natural woman gets that way, no matter what.

  8. If you find pure happiness, then you'll find who you are is worth loving and youll love yourself. i was never the pretty girl at school, i was always made fun of and never got guy to like me. during that age its all you thing about, but as you get older you cant have that mindset into adult hood.

  9. I think her counsellor isn't very … educated? She can completely get away from her ED and live a happy life without it. I think she's just not eating enough. Our bodies all have a set point and if she is pulling weights and only eating 2000 calories she is probably still starving herself and needs to eat more to stop obsessing so much. Follow the Canadian Food Diet and make sure you getting enough whole grains in there! Take care of yourself, be kind to your body! <3

  10. From bulimia to steroid queen. look at her face lines. Coz of steroid side effect her body produces more testosterone than usual. And probably she has facial hair too.

  11. Either way its an obsession with how she looks. It's pure vanity whether it was starving herself or controlling what she eats to build herself up to a monster-woman. Either way there is something mentally wrong, and you will never learn to love yourself for who you are. Huge problems with both. It's obsession with food no matter what you do not eat or do eat or what you blow your cookies over… insane…

  12. My brother in law is a bodybuilder. He lives off of supplements, alot of meat, and very little carbs. I followed him through his last competition and I was shocked. He went from 260 to 210ish in 11 weeks. All competitions are is who can strave themselves the best while keeping as much muscle as possible.

  13. An eating disorder is something that you can be 100% free from; this therapist lied to say that you will never get rid of it and that the "best you can do" is replace it with something else — that's not true! I am very sorry to see that this is still in a prison of sorts… I pray that this will change 100% for you, if I can be healed, then so can you! God bless you & FIND A NEW COUNSELOR!!!!!

  14. She mentioned that being skinny isn't attractive but some of us girls are naturally thin. Can't help it besides eating healthy and working out. But still, based on our height and such, some females who are thin like myself only have to be so big to be at our max healthiest weight. Being unhealthy and bony is different from just being naturally thin though. In my opinion. Good for her though for overcoming something so hard. 😊

  15. Its thanks to woman like her , that i find motivation to keep trying to overcome the struggles i have with my eating disorder.
    its okay to admit you have a weakness

  16. This chicks deltoids are popping. She's definitely taking stuff near competition time, idk about the rest. Girls who watch this, you will not get big and huge like her if you lift weights. Ok, I'm done. Carry on!

  17. Congratulations to her. She's aware of the problem, in control of it, and is looking more beautiful and healthier. And kudos to her husband for providing loving support.

  18. it's not sad because what some girls are aiming for isn't attractive, it's sad cause it's really deadly

  19. It's fine, I don't understand the negativity in this video, doesn't matter if she change her eating disorder with another addiction as long as she is healthy, now she is healthy than ever, if bodybuilding take her away from hurting her body, fine!! it's better than bulimia. Now she isn't damaging her body.

  20. "It's sad because girls want to be skinny but none of that's attractive." Let's ditch the how attractive we look persona and replace that with a look at how healthy we are for starters.

  21. having muscles is definetely better than being that thin.
    it's kinda dangerous to be that thin. there are only a very few cases in which someone is that thin naturally and that's a disease.
    i don't know why people call this extreme. she's like any other bodybuilder out there physically now. not even as extreme as a lot of bodybuilders can be.

    the only problem that persists is that it's still nagging at her in the back of her head. but she did the smart thing and stayed in shape in a better way. she's not nothing anymore. she's something. i wish people could just calm down about it and see that…instead of choking on the fact that a woman has more muscles than the general population of men…really now, of all the things to get hung up over…?

  22. what she's doing is basically switching from one unhealthy obsession to the other I mean did you see how she still weighs her food and controls (key word here) her intake and exercise? I hope she's okay now 'cause this didn't look like healthy behavior at all.

  23. At least she is honest about how bodybuilding for her is just another form of a disorder and a way to control her food intake. She does not try to hide it like many others.

  24. She’s still obsessed with her weight and calorie counting and eating habits. She’s still sick 🙁

  25. this woman is absolutely beautiful inside and out. I am on my way to recovery by bodybuilding as well. So inspirational! Please, take care of yourself everyone- you only get one life.

  26. Eating disorders are the most difficult psychological conditions to treat. Kudos to her and her husband. Keep fighting for your life and family Laura.

  27. My moms friend is a body builder and I think if you do it write it’s okay but I think she’s okay and the way she’s coping isn’t the best but she’s being healthy and I think it’s okay

  28. How about the fact that she’s trying? It’s hard to get out of that toxic disorder, even if she’s replacing it with another obsession. She’s trying though, she’s eating and doing what she cannot to fall back into that dangerous place and she isn’t going overboard.

  29. As someone who has struggled with an eating disorder, the comment section is appalling. The disorder is just as much about body image as it is about controlling your body when mentally you feel out of control. She's trying her best to stay healthy, managing a family, building on her mentality (seeing a councelor), while trying to control an eating disorder. Eating disorders are never really cured, you just learn to transmit it to something better. She's happier, healthier, and continuing to persue her life in a positive light moving forward. Be proud, not ashamed.

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